Monday, July 27, 2009

Don't take this the wrong way...

But screw the haka it's all about the Welsh National Anthem.




This is rugby pageantry to me.

I need to go to Wales and experience this shit. I mean really how cool is that? The first test match I ever watched was back in '04 when Wales played NZ in the a fall international. I watched it and a)fell in love with the sport b) fell in love with my buddies Jones, Williams, and Thomas. It's funny I really could have gone either way. Sure I could have sided with the all blacks or one of the other rugby giants (not that Wales is too shabby in its own right) but really I'm glad to back my team, through some particularly gnarly 6 nations campaigns to grand slam victories and lions honors. Is there a point to this post? I'm looking for some warm fuzzy rugby memories to keep me going.

I SHOULD be hired on permanent this week. It SHOULD be about another month before I get a healthcare package. I SHOULD be a lot happier in 30-40 days. Time to reset the clock. I apologize for being not showing up to palo alto this summer. It's been 7 almost 8 months now and I really can't stand just watching rugby. It makes me grumpy and depressed (I've missed starting for the ABs in a dev game against the Amazons, missed playing in my first Champagne Classic, missed traveling/participating in the Glendale game, missed playing prom dress rugby for the first time, missed trying out for the u23 grizzlies (my last chance), missed playing in a fun round robin with the slug kids (stiff arms galore), missed a scrimmage that ended up being contact drills/warmup against Stanford, missed playing against the kids and playing with my best friends in my first alumni game, missed midnight 7s, missed palo alto 7s, and most importantly missed the point in a number of practices/drills due to worrying about injuries/not wanting to go 100%).

Fuck.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Playing Scared

I'm kind of at a crossroad right now so I haven't really been in the mood for posting. To be honest I'm still kind of in a funk and I haven't decided how I'm going to deal with it. This is all on the rugby side of things. Works been going and a bunch of buddies have been trickling up to the bay so things have been pretty good at that end. I'm just reallyreallyreallyreally waiting on insurance. My hips been bugging me more and more as well. It's kind of getting into my head at practice and doubt and fear has kind of overshadowed the fun of the game. I'm seriously tired of playing scared. I just want to have some damn fun. One more week and I should have a better attitude.